Bye Bye Blogger!

Theos0phia.wordpress.com

I have decided to move to wordpress! The reason is mainly because I've been annoyed that blogger doesn't seem to have anything resembling tech support, and a problem I've had with commenting has gone unsolved since August, with no reply to several emails or helpforum posts I've made. So now I'm voting with my feet, so to speak.

I do like that on Wordpress, you can leave replies to individual comments. I also like that it is possible to customize layouts, although it looks pretty complicated to me. The new blog is up now, but I will still be playing with it for a bit, and I don't have all my links up yet.

If you have any problems with my Wordpress blog, leave a comment on this post to let me know. I've disallowed commenting on my older posts on this blog, but you can still comment on my wordpress blog (hopefully, assuming I didn't screw up my settings). I will keep this blog up for a few weeks until I get the new one arranged correctly.

See you there!

Actually, Veils Don't Stop Pervs

I read an interesting article on Altmuslimah the other day. It discussed attempts to document (and hopefully put an end to) rampant sexual harassment in Egypt; you can read it here.

But this was the part I found really interesting:

"... [The study] found that 72.5% of victims surveyed were wearing hijab when they were sexually harassed. This is important because it shows the invalidity of the argument too many muslims (men AND women) bandy about of hijab being a protection against rape and harassment. Logically, even without this study, we can see why it’s not a reasonable argument: women in burqas in Afghanistan are raped, 99 year old grandmas are raped. These events show the appearance of a rape victim/survivor is NOT the determining factor in an attack. The determining factor is the man.

And as long as Muslims try to make the argument that hijab is the magical protection against sexual harassment and rape, then they continue to place the blame on the victim/survivor and are buying into the “she was asking for it by dressing like that” argument, and not where it sqaurely belongs: on the man." (Emphasis mine).

I mention this not to imply that there is something wrong with wearing hijab, but I do think its wrong to tell women that hijab will somehow protect them from harrasment - or that not wearing hijab somehow invites it. Unfortunately, women must always be vigilant, regardles of how they are dressed.

Hadith, Revisited

Back on the blog I started with, I wrote a post about my view on hadith. I have decided to re-open that can of worms.

Recently this topic has cropped up in the comment section of an earlier post, so I thought I'd open the subject up again with its own post. I wrote the following comment on this blog (in reference to vol. 1, book 6, number 301 of Bukhari):

"In fairness, it may be gut instinct as well as reason that makes me question the hadiths. I will not follow a Prophet who disrespects my entire gender. Why on earth would I? What possible motivation do I have to make myself believe that God intentionally made me deficient?"

Needless to say, I remain skeptical of hadith. I am bringing this topic up again because I want to find out if I'm missing something here - if there exists some bit of knowledge I've skipped over that would instill in me some tiny seed of belief that the hadiths are, in fact, accurate records of the words and deeds of the Prophet of Islam. I feel that the hadith are especially harsh towards women, something that would seem to contradict the impression I got of gender relations in the Quran. As a woman, I feel a responsibility to understand this divergence. As a possible convert, my religious future is inextricably tied to understanding the legitimacy and power of the hadiths.

So I ask you, dear readers and fellow bloggers, for your help. How do you feel about the hadiths? What influenced you regarding those feelings? What research have you done regarding hadiths? Was it helpful, and would you recommend anything? Regardless of their accuracy, do you feel the hadiths are relevant today, or limited by their time and place?

I do ask that those who choose to comment be respectful to each other. I will be moderating all comments.

Truth and Religion: a brief look at Abdolkarim Soroush (and some other thoughts)

Before I begin, I just want to mention a great post I read recently over at Tazaqqa's blog - a favorite of mine - called "Revealed scriptures vs divine inspiration"... a must-read! I reach different conclusions than she, but I still found the post very moving.

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Now, to my post. I've just started reading some of Abdolkarim Soroush's work. He is an Iranian religious intellectual and I must admit that I enjoy reading his thoughts. If you peruse the links on this blog you'll find one leading to his website, where you can find a number of his lectures and essays in both English and Persian. Today I just wanted to share a few quotes from a book I'm reading, "Reason, Freedom, and Democracy in Islam: Essential Writings of Abdolkarim Soroush".

Religion vs Religious Thought

This is a concept I found most refreshing when it comes to Islamic thought. Basically, it means that in endeavors to understand religion, or the reform/revival of religion, one must first understand that their is a difference between the religion itself and our understanding of religion.

"The truth is that as long as one has not distinguished between religion and people's understanding of it, one will be incapable of finding an adequate answer to these intriguing questions. Yes, it is true that sacred scriptures are (in the judgment of followers) flawless; however, it is just as true that human beings' understanding of religion is flawed. Religion is sacred and heavenly, but the understanding of religion is human and earthly... Religion has not faltered in articulating its objectives and its explanations of good and evil; the defect is in human beings' understanding of religion's intents. Religion is in no need of reconstruction and completion. Religious knowledge and insight that is human and incomplete, however, is in constant need of reconstruction. Religion is free from cultures and unblemished by the artifacts of human minds, but religious knowledge is, without a shadow of a doubt, subject to such influences... It is up to God to reveal a religion, but up to us to understand and realize it. It is at this point that religious knowledge is born, entirely human and subject to all the dictates of human knowledge."

A Motto to Live By

The beginning of the book included and interview with Soroush, in which he discusses some of his personal ethics. I found the following deeply inspiring:

"... I always follow a single motto. It is rather easy to state but hard to practice. I believe that truths everywhere are compatible; no truth clashes with any other truth. They are all the inhabitants of the same mansion and stars in the same constellation. One truth in one corner of the world has to be harmonious and compatible with all truths elsewhere, or else it is not truth. That is why I have never tired of my search for truth in other arenas of intellect and opinion. This truthfulness of the world is a blessing indeed, because it instigates constant search and engenders a healthy pluralism."

This defines perfectly my (intended) method of understanding Islam. I hold certain truths in my heart that I couldn't escape if I wanted to. So far these truths seem compatible with those of Islam, but I continue to search and question in order to discover if it is so.

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And now, some other thoughts:

Its funny... I remember crying when I first began reading the Quran. It was a beautiful yet painful moment, as if my heart was breaking. And I do feel as if the Quran broke open my heart; emotions seem stronger than they did before, with moments of great comfort and great confusion coming one after the other. I feel more awake. It reminds me of falling in love.

I don't know what all this means yet, just something I've been reflecting on lately.

Nighttime Train Ride

I'm off to visit family up in Oregon! I'm taking a train overnight - which I actually find sort of romantic. I'll drift and dream and wake up someplace new.

Anyhoo, I won't be posting for a bit. Lots to do before fall quarter starts. I plan to keep up the blog during school, though there may be bigger gaps between posting I'm afraid. Hope ya'll have a great Eid!

The Difficulties of Public Muslim-ness AND On the Matter of Love & Marriage: A Post in Two Parts

I have two matters troubling me of late, so its time for a double post!

The Difficulties of Public Muslim-ness

I have been trying to slowly integrate Muslim rituals into my daily life in order to see if I can get comfortable with the practices. In private, its been remarkably easy: I love wudhu (so refreshing!), I'm learning to say the Opening surah in Arabic (beautiful - at least when other people say it), and although I'm not praying salat yet, I am praying informally throughout the day, which has been a subtly powerful experience. The problems for me seem to arise outside the home... primarily at work.

I'm not going to go into detail about what I do for a living. Its retail and I hate it, and I'm going to leave it at that. The women's bathroom has a sink and two stalls. The stalls have latches, the door to the bathroom doesn't. It is used by employees and customers alike and its usually pretty busy in there... lots of people coming and going while a person is at the sink. I try to do wudhu as fast as I possibly can, but it feels like I'm being sneaky and it certainly doesn't make me feel very spiritual. Also, this bathroom is pretty gross - it doesn't get cleaned nearly enough for the amount of traffic it gets, despite multiple complaints. I REFUSE to take my shoes of in there to wash my feet. Even if I had guaranteed privacy, there is no way I would feel clean afterwards. Performing ablutions at home only helps a little; I work 8 hour days, sometimes more... sooner or later nature calls. The other problem is finding a place to prostrate. There are no private areas at work. The best I could do is to find a corner of the parking lot thats slightly obscured and hope it doesn't rain.

I just don't feel ready to be "out", so to speak. I'm still trying to figure out if Islam is right for me, but I feel I have to try living as a Muslim to know that. Even if I was ready, I don't think my religion should be a public display. For those who would advise that I find a different job - believe me, I would if I could. The economy sucks right now, and I'm making more than average for a retail job. Until I finish school, my prospects are pretty sad. I'm really not sure what to do.

On the Matter of Love & Marriage

This is going to be a bit more personal (so try to remember my life has been pretty non-religious until recently - and don't get all judge-y). I recently read a thread on Free-Minds.Org about Islam's stand on premarital sex and it got me thinking. I want to know: how is marriage defined in Islam? Is a couple considered married if they are legally married by the state? Is a couple considered married if they meet some other standard, even if they don't get legally married? Is marriage about paperwork, or about the promises exchanged between two people?

I have a boyfriend. We've been together nearly 7 years. We lived separately for the first couple years, then I started staying at his place about half the time, and the last 3-4 years we've lived together. And yes, we've been sexually intimate for the vast majority of the relationship. We've also been faithful companions to each other, supporting each other through hard times and enjoying each other in good times. We've talked about getting married... I guess both of us just have trouble seeing how it would change things. We both have divorced parents and have seen friends and family jump into loveless marriages - the act of marriage didn't improve things for them. And on a practical level, marriage is not cheap! Finally, a long time ago I promised my mother I would finish college before I got married... neither of us predicted it would take me this long to get through school, but I try to keep my promises.

I guess I feel that in the ways that matter, he is already my husband. We've exchanged promises about our lives together and our future, we've got dozens of friends and family who have witnessed our devotion, and we've outlasted several actual marriages. He's part of my family and I'm part of his. I can't believe that the life we've had together - sex and all - is a bad thing. But would it be considered bad in Islam? Thats what I hope to find out.

On the Matter of My Nom de Plume

I chose the name Sophia when I was reading about people taking "Muslim" names when they convert. There's a lot of debate on whether such a thing is necessary, on whether it has to be an Arab name or not, etc. My opinion is that it's not needed, but it might be beneficial. I also don't think it has to be from any particular nationality. I decided that IF I converted and IF I wanted a name to reflect that, it would be Sophia - thus the name of the blog. I read the Bible a long time ago because I was curious, and Proverbs chapter 8 caught my eye. It refers to a personification of wisdom, but some translations simply use the Greek word for wisdom: Sophia. Thus the title of this blog, Theosophia, literally means "god-wisdom".

I'm reading a fascinating book right now; No God but God: The Origins, Evolution, and Future of Islam by Reza Aslan. I hope to write more on this book, but there was a section I read recently that just about made my heart skip a beat:

"Others have suggested that Sufi is a corruption of the Greek word sophia: "wisdom". This is also unlikely, though there is a tempting symbolic connection between the two words. For if sophia is to be understood in its Aristotelian sense as "knowledge of ultimate things," then it is very much related to the term Sufi, just not linguistically."

How 'bout that! I definitely want to study more about Sufism, but I have been trying to ground myself in "the basics" of Islam first. I feel kinda bad... I have read half a dozen books about Islam in the past two months, and I still haven't finished the Quran! Part of the problem is I just bounced around reading whatever section caught my attention, then researching the meaning and history behind certain difficult verses, taking some notes, and bouncing around some more. I decided a few weeks ago to start over from the beginning to make sure I don't miss anything... and I'm only 1/4 of the way through! Oh well, after I finish the book I'm on I'll pick up where I left off... at least now I'm keeping track.

A Random Poem

Lord of my heart, teach me how best to love you

To praise you with each heartbeat, with each breath that leaves my lips

Beloved, let me be the moon that glows in your sunlight

Fill me with your light, show me what I am

I wander in darkness, ignorant, the whole Earth between us

I would wander forever, dreaming of You

Technical Difficulties

Ok, so it seems blogger has made some changes to comment moderation, and for some weird reason this means that I am unable to post comments on my own blog! I don't know if it is affecting other people who leave comments or just me. I reported the problem to blogger yesterday... hopefully they will eventually get back to me. Until then, please don't take it personally if I don't respond to comments immediately.

Also (because apparently it bears repeating) - absolutely no anonymous comments will be published on this blog. In order to avoid confusion, those who wish to leave comments will need to put a name on their comment so readers can identify who's who. For now, I will manually reject any comments left anonymously and they will never be read. If needed I will simply eliminate the option altogether, but I thought I'd be nice to those people who don't want to create a google account just to leave a comment.

On a completely different note: Good luck to those of you fasting for Ramadan! I hope you all have a blessed month!

The Bhagavad Gita

The Setting

Two great households, the Pandavas and the Kauravas, are royal cousins that grew up together. Through wickedness and greed Duryodhada of the Kauravas exiled the Pandavas and took the kingdom for his own. Now Arjuna of the Pandavas, the hero of this tale, must face his own kin in a bloody war. On the battlefield with his family behind him and before him, he falls to his knees in despair. His charioteer is Krishna, who offered to be counselor for Arjuna but would not take up arms. Krishna counsels Arjuna, and in the process tells Arjuna of the nature of God, of himself, and the various paths to liberation. For Krishna is far more than he appears...

Hindu Monotheism

I enjoyed this book immensely, as well as the commentaries. Part of the introduction really caught my attention.

"From the earliest times, Hinduism has proclaimed one God while accommodating worship of him (or her, for to millions God is the Divine Mother) in many different names. 'Truth is one,' says a famous verse of the Rig Veda; 'people call it by various names.' Monastic devotees might find that Shiva embodies the austere detachment they seek; devotees who want to live 'in the world,' partaking of its innocent pleasures but devoted to service of their fellow creatures, might find in Krishna the perfect incarnation of their ideals. In every case, this clothing of the Infinite in human form serves to focus a devotee's love and to provide an inspiring ideal. But whatever form is worshipped, it is only an aspect of the same one God." Hindu monotheism - who knew? I suppose an argument could be made that this is really an example of henotheism or panentheism, but at its core this belief seems to be that God is not limited to one form or one act of devotion, but all of us worship the same limitless Diety.

What IS detachment?

Anyone loosely familiar with Buddhism has heard the word "detachment". It brings to mind the image of an austere monk meditating alone... not what the average person aspires to. Again I will quote from the commentaries: "It [the Bhagavad Gita] teaches that we can become free by giving up not material things, but selfish attachments to material things - and more importantly, to people. It asks us to renounce not the enjoyment of life, but the clinging to selfish enjoyment whatever it may cost others. It pleads, in a word, for the renunciation of selfishness in thought, word, and action - a theme that is common to all mystics, West and East alike."

As Krishna puts it:

"One who shirks action does not attain freedom; no one can gain perfection by abstaining from work. Indeed, there is no one who rests for even an instant; all creastures are driven to action by their own nature."

...

"Actions do not cling to me because I am not attached to their results. Those who understand this and practice it live in freedom. Knowing this truth, aspirants desiring liberation in ancient times engaged in action. You too can do the same, pursuing an active life in the manner of those ancient sages."

Renunciation or detachment doesn't mean hiding from the world or one's own emotions, it means recognizing them as transient things and existing beyond them. Pain and pleasure, sorrow and joy, are just the result of outside stimuli and cannot touch the soul. One can watch these dualities as if watching a dance or a play, enjoying the show while not being fundamentally shaken by it. Krishna again:

"They live in freedom who have gone beyond the dualities of life. Competing with no one, they are alike in success and failure and content with whatever comes to them. They are free, without selfish attachments; their minds are fixed in knowledge. They perform all work in the spirit of service, and their karma is dissolved."

What does it all mean?

In short, I don't know. I think I could spend my life reading this book and only scratch the surface. The book comprises of everything from practical meditation tips and down-to-earth advise to hinting at the mystery of the cosmos. The underlying themes include; that God is one, even when it seems otherwise; that God loves us; that anyone with the genuine desire can attain closeness to God; that the spark of God exists in and beyond everything. That doesn't mean worshipping idols, just recognizing the miracle of God's creation.

"Arjuna, I am the taste of pure water and the radiance of the sun and moon. I am the sacred word and the sound heard in air, and the courage of human beings. I am the sweet fragrance in the earth and the radiance of fire; I am the life in every creature and the striving of the spiritual aspirant."

In this tale Krishna is no mere man, he is a manifestation of God in a form easier for human minds to handle. At one point in the Gita Arjuna asks to see God's true form. Krishna removes the layers of illusion that surround him and shows his true form to Arjuna... it is a form so beautiful and terrifying that Arjuna cannot continue describing it, and begs God to return to the comforting form of Krishna.

The Bhagavad Gita does acknowledge that souls who do good with go to heaven, and souls that do evil go to hell - punished or beloved by whatever deities they worshipped in life... but after their deeds are rewarded or repaid they are reborn again to make another attempt at learning of their true nature and the nature of God. Only those who leave the cycle of rebirth can become one with God. What is interesting to note here is this doesn't mean worshiping a Hindu deity, it can be whatever form of God the aspirant feels the most love for - it is all the same God. The book outlines in broad strokes several paths to God (or enlightenment), and while it favors some methods over others it still contends that all paths lead (eventually) to God.

I really enjoyed this book, and I think its message is fairly universal. I am not quite done posting on this topic, but I am out of time for today. I find a lot of technical stuff varies greatly from the teachings of the Quran, but a few similarities did catch my eye. I am hoping to compare and contrast some verses of the Quran with some from the Bhagavad Gita in a future post. Readers, please suggest any quotes from the Quran (or other religious texts) that you feel would be appropriate.

Free Sakineh

I heard about this the other day and I feel compelled to help spread the word. From FreeSakineh.Org:

Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani, Iranian Mother, could be put to death at any moment

August 9: Fate of Sakineh to be handed down this week – hanging likely; President Lula’s offer of amnesty flatly refused by Iranian leadership.

Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani, a 43 year old mother of two, was convicted in May 2006 of having an “illicit relationship” with two men and received 99 lashes as her sentence. Despite already having been punished, she has now been further convicted of “adultery” and she and sentenced to death by stoning.

She is currently being held on death row in Tabriz Prison, north-west Iran, and faces imminent execution. Around July 7th , following international protests, officials in Tabriz asked the head of Iran’s judiciary to agree that her sentence of stoning to death be converted to execution by hanging.

On 10 July, the head of Iran’s High Council for Human Rights said that her case would be reviewed, although he affirmed that Iranian law permits execution by stoning.

On 14 July Sajjad Qaderzadeh, Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani’s son, was summoned to Tabriz’s Central Prison, and is believed to have been questioned by Ministry of Intelligence officials who possibly threatened him not to give further interviews about his mother’s case.

It is clear Sakineh remains ingrave risk… PLEASE sign this petition which calls on the Iranian authorities to clarify her current legal status, demands that the authorities enact legislation that bans stoning as a legal punishment, and eliminates other forms of the death penalty for “adultery” such as fogging or imprisonment.

As of my signature, they have over 160,000 signatures. Will it be enough to spare her life? Perhaps not, but in the words of Edmund Burke, "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing".

Reason, Intellect, and Faith: A look at the Mu'tazili

This is actually a pretty complex topic, perhaps a little over my head, but I found it too interesting to avoid delving in. I will try to be as accurate as possible, but understand that this is the result of my limited research and I encourage those interested to study further. I did use wikipedia for this because it spelled things out in a clear way, but there are other resources out there.

Mu'tazilah is an Islamic school of speculative theology that flourished primarily in Basra and Baghdad in the 8th-10th centuries. Although the school of thought itself declined sharply in popularity - it is only adopted today by a minority of Muslim intellectuals - many of its doctrines and methodologies were effectively cannibalized by other schools of thought which did survive.

History:

Like many schools, it developed over centuries and had many different evolutions and interpretations, as well as multiple subgroups that held different political priorities. Caliph al-Ma'mun espoused certain beliefs shared by Mu'tazilah school (and several others) that the Quran is the created word of God. But he instituted the Mihna - an Inquisition - against religious opponents of that belief in an attempt to gain full control over the religious sphere as well as the secular. The Mu'tazilis were seen as instigators of this persecution campaign and lost popularity.

The Mu'tazilis held the truths of Islam as their starting point and primary reference, but also relied on logic, as well as various philosophies (early Islamic, Greek, and Hellenistic). Issues they sought to address: "whether the Qur'an was created or eternal, whether evil was created by God, the issue of predestination versus free will, whether God's attributes in the Qur'an were to be interpreted allegorically or literally, etc." (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mu'tazili)

The Nature of God, and the Importance of Reason AND Revelation:

Their view on Divine Unity is quite interesting. At its core, its the same as the majority of Muslims - there is no God but God. What is different is how they view God's attributes. According to Seyyed Hossein Nasr, in his book Islam, "where the Quran asserts that God is the Hearer and the Seer, the Mu'tazilites claimed that hearing and seeing in this case had nothing to do with what we understand by these Attributes; otherwise we would have an anthropomorphic image of God." Basically, if we take a literal view that God sees in the way that humans see (with actual eyes), we are limiting his definition to human terms and God is far beyond human limitations. Also, they deny that God's attributes are separate from God's essence. Some Mu'tazilis took a metaphorical interpretation of the Quran in this regard, others simply chose to affirm the Attributes while believing they were beyond our understanding, and others avoided judgement on this issue altogether.

Curiously, they believed all humans with full mental faculties - even those without access to scripture or revelation - are obligated to seek knowledge of God's existence and attributes. They also believed that humans were capable of being moral without revelation, at least on a basic level. In other words, God gave us the capacity to know right and wrong in general, and he gave us revelations to elaborate on the details from that point. Thus, reason and revelation are complimentary, not contradictory.

This was just a brief look at the Mu'tazilah school of thought, and there is a lot more to study and say about it. I bring it up simply because I find some of their views compelling, although some others (which I didn't get into here) I don't really agree with. Still, it gives me hope that there are so many ideas out there, and maybe one day the propagation of ideas won't be equated with blasphemy, but rather as a noble quest for better understanding of the divine.

The Beginning... Again

I started a blog a few weeks ago as a sort of online journal, hoping that sharing my thoughts would help me better understand my own beliefs whilst I learned about Islam. Here is my first post on my blog "Blue-eyed Muslimah (to-be)":

I started this post because I have a long road ahead of me. Several weeks ago I read the Quran for the first time, and it had what I can only describe as a profound effect on me. I had been curious about religion and specifically Islam since I was a kid, having been raised in a relatively secular household (we had Christmas and Easter but with no mention of Jesus or church visits, what I refer to as "Hallmark Christianity"). I felt a need to find religion for many years, but none seemed to quite fit and I resigned myself to being an agnostic - not bad, really, but it felt like I was settling for less than what I needed.

When I read the Quran for the first time, it - quite frankly - moved me. It moved me to tears, in fact. I sobbed until I couldn't read the words anymore, whispering, "Thank you, thank you, thank you..." It was a shattering experience for a lifelong non-believer, for the daughter of a man who always scoffed religion, for someone who has no Muslim friends, or even devoutly religious friends, and who never saw this coming. Yet here I am, suddenly and irrevocably a believer. Part of me thinks I'm just going crazy... but most of me thinks that such a powerful response shouldn't be ignored.

All that said, I doubt I'll be a good Muslim. I'm WAAAAAAY too liberal to be orthodox, and even some of the more "moderate" elements of Islam are too much for me! But I think even becoming a bad Muslim would bring me closer to God and make me a better person, so I'm going to give it a try. I feel that religion is a tool for bringing us closer to the divine. Not every tool works for every job, or in this case every person, so you need to choose with intelligence and be open to new ideas. It can be a weapon in the wrong hands. Right now, I think Islam is the tool for me.

I have since decided that, although my interest in Islam has not wavered, calling myself a Muslim-to-be might be causing undue confusion or even inspiring hostility in orthodox Muslims. Should that be my problem? Not really, but I didn't come to Islam just to piss people off. Also, I want to learn about Islam and learn about myself, without creating limits. I've been inspired by the following, written by a Sufi named Hussein ibn Mansur al-Hallaj:

“I thought about various beliefs, passionately wishing to understand them, and understood that they are similar to many branches of one tree. Do not force a man to prefer one belief to another because it will distract him from the trunk. In fact the trunk itself searches for the person and shows him its greatness and all its secret values for him to comprehend them.”

Islam may turn out to be the "branch" for me... or not. Either way, I don't think it really matters what I call myself, so why give myself such a specific label? I'm going to continue my studies and my blogging, but with a slightly more open-ended viewpoint. Hopefully this will still meet my initial goals behind blogging, and maybe some of you will have their curiosity piqued by the things I write about. Enjoy.